This is for your eyes only; you being anyone not living in Idaho. (Please bless my brother-in-law, Ron doesn't read this, because he will rip me a new one. And he is WAY smarter than me so it won't be hard.) Some of my most beloved people on the planet are Idaho-dwellers, and although is in completely incomprehensible to me, they love it there, they are happy & are raising wonderful, civilized children. Somehow. I don't understand it. I am generally a very tolerant person. Take care of your responsibilities, contribute to society, try to be kind & we will probably get along swimmingly. I am not remotely racist, but I am an Idahoist. An antiIdahite, if you will. And I'll tell you why:
IT'S BECAUSE EVERYFREAKING TIME I AM DRIVING ON THE FREEWAY & SOME YAY-WHO UP YONDER IS GUMMING UP THE WORKS, IT IS ALLLLLWAYS AN IDAHOAN!!!
Yesterday I was coming home from Bountiful at 5:30 pm. Not on purpose believe me. Things have been great since the Legacy Highway completion, but I generally try to not drive at that time anyway. Well yesterday just happened to be an accident day. Just past Lagoon. Accident. It's cool though, I'm in the carpool lane. (Also known as the EXPRESS lane.) So me & my fellow high occupancy vehicles are cruising past the poor suckas going two miles an hour. Yeah! Happy driving time. Thumb your nose at other people time. Good time. Wait, what is this? Why has the carpool lane traffic started to slow? There is no reason for this. Luckily I'm in my big beautiful Land Cruiser (thank you Matt!), and can see over other tiny little cars. It appears that there is a small P.O.S. car seven cars ahead that has decided to not make the other lanes of traffic feel badly about the situation they are in. This kind soul would not like to make them jealous of our carpool status, so he's going to go the SAME PACE as the other lanes. Very good-hearted, no?
Guess where he was from?
Right! (the correct answer is Idaho)
Guess how many people were in his car?
Right! (the correct answer is one)
So yeah. I know they don't have any reason to have express lanes in Idaho, but you have heard of them, have you not? You do have the ability to READ THE SIGNS on the freeway. Perhaps follow what they say next time, mmm-kay?
Thanks for letting me rant.
p.s. I am fully aware that there are children starving all throughout the world. There are awful things that happen to inoccent people everyday. It's a very trite thing that I am complaining about. I know this. Yet I reserve my right to complain about whatever I want. It's my blog & I'll cry if I want to. Whaaaaah!
p.p.s. I also hate that our newest license plate design so closely resembles the Idaho plate. Dumb. Make up your own design, Utah. Stick with the beautiful arches one. Make a pretty Lake Powell one. Do something cool with the Great Salt Lake. I have plenty of ideas, we don't need to steal ideas from Idaho of all places. Geez.