You say it's your birthday? It's my birthday too!

At 11:47 tonight I will officially turn 30. The Big 3-0. I've decided that thirty feels freeing. I think in your twenties there is a lot of pleasing other people, figuring out who you came here to be, what's important to you, you know, stuff like that. And now I'm pretty settled in those things & just want to move forward, progress & care less about what others think & more about what my Heavenly Father thinks. It feels good.
Yesterday Cyd, Matt, Sawyer, Abram & I went to breakie at The Original Pancake House. That place makes me happy.


Freaking yum. Having a family of five makes me happy. Cydney has been such a joy to have with us. After breakfast Cyd & Abram accompanied me to my hair appointment where my hair was throughly sexified by Elizabeth. Then we met back up with Matt & Sawyer and browsed the Nordstrom Rack. Got me some Meks. Yay for hot, long jeans! Then my cute boyfriend Matt took Mr Abram & I to the Melting Pot for dinner. Our waiter was awesome, our food was awesome, my hair & outfit were awesome, and I wouldn't have changed a thing about the entire day. Bliss. It was such a gorgeous night, we just drove around with the windows down & chatted. Then we went to Target & wandered the aisles, one of my favorite things to do. Once we got home & got kids to bed we tried to watch a movie called The Invention of Lying, but fell asleep halfway through, due to no fault of the movie, believe me. It is hilarious, and we'll try it again tonight, maybe start it before eleven, we are 30 now after all and can't be expected to stay awake through an entire motion picture. This morning I treated myself to one of these:


then my parents came to bring me a gift & flowers & a card. They are so sweet & make such a huge effort to show their love.
I'm such a lucky girl. Sawyer has been making good on her promise to not whine for my birthday. She's such a good gifter.
Anyway, I didn't intend for this post to be a play-by-play of my birthday celebrations. Rather I just feel so blessed at this time in my life & wanted to document how I feel at 30. There are so many things I never thought I'd do that I've done, experiences that have shaped my life that I'd never have sought out for myself. It's funny how God has other plans that bring more joy than we ever could have imagined with all our scheming.
Never thought I'd get married so young
Never thought I'd get divorced
Never thought I'd do accounting during most of my working years
Never thought I'd get to go to France during spring break
Never thought I'd graduate from college (not that I didn't want to, it's just that after getting divorced & whatnot, it just didn't seem in the cards)
Never thought I'd be able to go to so many great concerts & travel to so many amazing places
Never thought I'd still be friends with the pack of dorks I met at the bus stop in the first day of Jr High (I thank God for them everyday)
Never, ever, ever thought I'd do a pageant
Never even remotely wanted to do a drug-free birth
Never thought I'd be a wedding caker (although I think I'm about done, not worth the drama)

These are all things that have enriched my life, introduced me to amazing friends, or taught me remarkable lessons. I used to be a very regular Reader's Digest reader. When I was probably 11 or 12 I ripped a little story out of one that I've saved ever since. It describes a boy who had a dream of how he wanted his life to go. How many kids & what each would be like, what his wife would look like, his career, home, every detail was mapped out, he planned & made goals to achieve everything, then he told God about his plan. God said "that sounds like a nice plan, I want you to be happy." So the man went about his life just certain that it all would work out like he wanted. He goes about his life & then one day he remembered his dream & became very sad. He spoke to his wife, his pastor, his friends, his accountant, anyone who would listen, trying to understand why things didn't work out like he'd wanted. Then one night he pours his heart out to God telling him how disappointed he is that He didn't help him out with his dream "why didn't you give me the things I wanted?" God replies "why didn't you give me what I wanted?". It had never occurred to the man that God was in want of anything. "I wanted you to be happy" God said. God then points out the beautiful life that He had provided for the man, things that far exceeded the dream that the man had for himself. So the man decides to enjoy & rejoice in the life he has & in the fact that God had tailor made it for him with his knowledge of what would really make the man happy.
I love that story. It's so simply written & a beautiful reminder of the fact that we always do better when we place our trust in him & his love for us.
I'm so grateful that He knows me better, that He forgives me better & loves me better than I'll ever know.
Here's to another decade of trying to remember that better.

- Posted from my iPhone